It has been awhile since I took the time to do any personal writing, and get things off my chest as a writer. I have been working alot on my blockchain digital currency project (myteencoin.com) and watching a lot of youtube videos on clothing hauls to survive the pandemic which I have resorted to as a form of loneliness therapy since I have been single now for years and self-isolation has made it even worse, but it is not all that bad.
Just passed my recent birthday and must say that family is really important and was glad to see my grandpa and grandpa and aunt and uncles and have a good time in some very nice weather.
Winter arrived last week and brought a foot of snow with it and I have been fortunate enough to be out in the woods hunting deer the past week, where it has been one rush after another, without actually putting any meat in the freezer.
Life has got me in a tough position right now because I have become pretty weak and emotionally fragile from some hormonal adjustments I have been going through and I am slowly dreading the coming of another winter and possibly thinking of somehow finding a way to migrate into Mexico for Winter.
While my region of Canada is not in lockdown, the neighbouring covid-19 rates have begun to rise dramatically and more caution has been extended in areas where rates are increasing and areas may see more travel restrictions, but for now everything is working as normal as can be.
I had the opportunity to live in Banff, Canada over the summer, and put in over 200 hours at a ski resort as a chainsaw operator where I cleaned ski runs free of debris so they are smooth to ski on.
The hype and stoke of living in the mountains soon became too much for me as the vibe was high life and I could not muster up the balls to stay away from it and realized I was abusing myself and others, and making really poor decisions and for that I am sorry. I may never fix the wrong I did in this world, but I am now of the belief that our lives are sometimes so mixed up that we need to have hiccups along the way to help us get on clearer paths ahead.
The new vaccination for the pandemic could be a game changer in medicine and offer new world order opportunities for living in free zones and public support zones to reduce poverty and systemic racism and will allow revitalization zones to begin their paths to glory again, which may take awhile as we move into a new regime of living.
It is clear the system is trying to recover from a serious attack, which many war analysts predicted that the third world war would be a biological threat and cause more destruction than the other great wars.
The pandemic is proving this to be true on a daily basis, where millions of people around the globe face hysterical living conditions including restrictions on how they can live and where and what they can do with their time.
And for the first time in our history we have seen an increase in Artificial Intelligence spending and its impact on changing real-world outcomes in real time by altering the flow of information to distort and change reality. No where is this more prevalent that the deciding of the election in the USA where voters were split on their new president-elect, and still continues to be investigated as to how voters were manipulated by the media through corruption and hate-based trash campaigns.
Trump has pointed out these media biases, and as a result the election has turned into an on-going stress test for citizens of this globe who are patiently awaiting the results.
ONE NATION UNDER GOD?
It seems like the old adage ONUG may hold true as a case for redemption of humanity against the suffering that been caused by the international regime of COVID.
HAVE SOME FUN FOR GOD SAKES
It’s not all bad and some fun should be had. As a former fun-haver on a regular basis in Banff, I had to withdraw from the place because I was having so much fun. But now, I must face the world head-on because of the pandemic and try to aspire to get my life back on track by finding a woman, job, and try to bring some aspects of the business to the deal making table.
HOW TO RESTORE BALANCE
There needs to be more co-operation in green energy projects as a way to reimagine new ways of living under the pandemic society. Remember that the older generations had a different lifestyle and that the world has gone digital.
There is now a dependency on information, whether honest or lies, true or false, right or wrong, moral or corrupt, and the system feeds off it. All of our social media feeds and television networks have been infiltrated with social spamming mechanisms that impact the way we things, brainwashing us into something that hasn’t been defined yet. It is only going to become more intense and virtually real with the advent of 5G networks. As someone who often tests and analyses visual queues in the video I watch, I have been able to tell the difference between artificially created footage to present likenesses to cross-platform friends and avatars to create a socially virtual experience.
Having a conversations with a loved one over zoom or facetime can really make the difference in the happiness during the pandemic and more people should be offered ways to connect virtually, being able to integrate the system worldwide so people can experience the most live and virtual interfaces that simulate reality. That is a true escape and allows people to forget about life under the pandemic for awhile.
THE TRULY ISOLATED
Some say it is impossible to be truly isolated, but without any wife or kids I feel that I feel more isolated than other people in this world and may have impacted me psychologically by making me more lonely, and even psychotic times. My life has not been a pretty picture and is more of a horror story that has been trying to be lived with adventure at heart.
As a former adventurer (I have since moved from Adventurer to Writer), it is now time to document some of the placces I have been and how they impacted me, and how I can now look back at some of the adventures and learn from them while I slowly build up my mojo for the next one.
I have done many people wrong in this life because I felt like I had been beat down by a social force that had been created through friendship and if I somehow damaged this relationship, the opposite effect would happen and we would become better friends, even lovers. This is known as a love hate relationshiip and is often the most risky relationship to be in. Remember, I am not an eexpert in relationship advice, just here to share some of the neurotic issues I began facing the longer I was alone. I started questioning my relationships with friends, family, neighbours, co-workers, and began manifaesting myself into a mechanism of hate to push everyone away so I could be miserable in my own loneliness.
Never before have I felt so lonely, and it was excacerbated by drinking abuse, turning myself into a complete wreck. I tried to overcome this by going to a party and challenging the status quo of our own understanding off the world and soon thereafter was in a hospital being treated by a group of psychologists. I learned a lot about schizophrenia and bipolar syndrome, which is what I was diagnosed, but the more I think about it, I think my psychosis is due to loneliness. I think if I would have an emotional partner, and drinking partner, then I would able to have someone to share the experience with emotionally and personally and never let it get out of control.
THE GREAT MATCHMAKER
I often try to understand how some couples stay together, or how they met, or why they do the things they do? As a result, I have began watching videos on youtube to get insight into people’s lives and make better sense of the world. This is in a way why I traveled so much……to try to understand other cultures and how they lived. I found out some scary results that gave insight in how things in one area of the planet may be very different in another, but realized that even though we are apart, we are still connected.
I also realized how lazy I am, how my life has been overrun and that it seems like a I dont get a minute to realize even though it seems like I am doing absolutely nothing. Like sitting there with all cylinders firing, all dressed up and nowhere to go, and wonder how I’ll be able to control my stoke, while at other times feeling so beat down that I can’t even do the dishes or muster myself from under the covers. Is this normal?
I also learned a lot about love during my recent job working at a ski resort where I was doing a great service to the general public and working with some of the coolest and nicest people eI could ever meet. I also began hanging out around the Legion, a place for war veterans, and wonder how this impacted my mindset, and how I was such a loner refusing to give in to loneliness.
Then I started listening to Kygo Remix music and my life changed.
One of the greatest DJs is KYGO and has been one of the ways I have been able to cope with the highs of being full of stoke sometimes. November has been a month full of transition as I have moved from a tourist-party town to a secluded neck of the woods near my hometown where I am currently self-isolating as a new mode of living.
SELF-ISOLATING AND SOCIAL DISTANCING
I am looking forward to going out with friends again once the pandemic is over. I know the pandemic will last and that herd immunity is the true answer and sad that so many people are being affected by the virus., but glad that recovery rates are so high, and not really looking at all the conspiracies surrounding the invention and dissemination of COVID 19 and not even going to get into the aliens that were really a hot topic in the news.